Kareoke Night
You, Adam, Jonathan and a few others from Adam's production crew have piled into the hotel bar after the final dress rehearsal before his show begins its run. The other crew members have paired and trioed off in assorted areas of the bar. You, Adam, and Jonathan share a table. While you and Jonathan polish off some strictly non-alcoholic soft drinks, Adam slowly downs his second screwdriver. It is kareoke night in the bar and you all applaud wildly as a Welsh salesman passes out drunk on stage before he can finish the last verse of "Feelings".
"Thank goodness," you say, "If he'd have kept going I would have started in on the screwdrivers myself just hoping my hearing would somehow be dulled."
"Well yes, that's the problem with these damn kareoke whatchamacallits," Jonathan pipes up. "The ones who can actually sing are usually too shy to get up and try it so you get stuck with some soused, tone deaf, bastard's version of ABBA's greatest hits."
"Some of us who can actually sing have the nerve to get up there and pull it off you know," Adam says.
You roll your eyes. Jonathan smiles. "Go on then. Fiver says you won't."
Adam stands up. You stare up at him, somewhere near abject horror. "You're not actually going up there are you?" He kisses your forehead.
"Keep your money Jonathan. I'm gonna go up there and serenade my girl." Before you can protest again, Adam is already striding for the stage. You do the only thing you can do. You slap Jonathan's shoulder hard enough to ensure he thinks twice before "suggesting" things to Adam, ever, ever again.
Adam jumps on stage and grabs the microphone. "Hey how're we doing out there tonight kids?"
The joint stops dead. The crew is clapping and cheering what they are sure will be their boss about to make a fool out of himself. The other occupants are cheering at the opportunity to see a celebrity do something, no doubt, badly.
"Let me just find something appropriate, hang on." Adam walks to the side of the stage and confers with the house DJ while flipping through a large binder of the selections.
"Oh god," you whisper, dropping your head into your hands.
"Uh, sorry about that."
You glare at Jonathan between your fingers. "You know Adam, any excuse to perform and he's there. Are you sure you're not drinking anything stronger than *root* beer?"
Jonathan smiles sheepishly and goes back to drinking his soda. The music starts up. Your stomach feels like you've just taken the first dip on a roller coaster. You look up. Well, at least he looks every bit the rock star with his black leather pants, flowing blue satin shirt, and ponytail. Sure, you can get through this. You sip your drink to relieve your dry throat.
"I'd like to dedicate this song to my girl." He points out to you. You nearly choke on your soda and feel yourself blushing in the dim lighting.
Crazy, how it, feels tonight
Crazy, how you, make it all all right love
You crush me, with the, things you do
'Wow', you think, 'Adam really has a gorgeous singing voice.' You'd only ever heard him briefly in the shower before and as soon as you went in the bathroom, he pulled you in with him to pursue other activities. Adam sashays to the end of the stage nearest you and locks his eyes on yours.
I do for you anything too
Well if your weren't blushing before, you are for sure now. At least you think that's what that tingle must be.
Sitting, smoking, feeling high
Adam looks up and notices a small group of people from the lobby are now crowding around the door, even more of an audience. He grins broadly.
In this moment it feels so right
Adam leaps theatrically down from the stage. A spotlight flicks on (operated no doubt by a certain well-tipped DJ), following him into the crowd. He prowls up to you and places a hand under your chin. You feel every set of eyes in the place focus on you and your illusionist.
Lovely lady
I am at your feet
Adam drops obligingly down to kneel before you. It would be a sweet gesture, if only you'd worn a longer skirt. Since you didn't, you only feel yourself reddening deeper, knowing where his eyes are just now and wondering how many of the others watching know it too.
God I want you so badly
Your heart nearly jumps out of your chest. 'Did he just say what I thou...Oh man, I really hope that *is* the actual lyric.' Adam stands again. His hand stroking your hair, face, arm.
I wonder this
Could tomorrow be
So wondrous as you there sleeping
Let's go drive 'til morning comes
Watch the sunrise
To fill our souls up
Drink some wine 'til we get drunk
It's crazy I'm thinking
Just knowing that the world is round
Here I'm dancing on the ground
Am I right side up or upside down
Is this real or am I dreaming
Adam leans in and presses his forehead to yours. You are trying not to breathe so that the microphone doesn't pick you up. You just hope he'll move away again before you pass out.
Lovely lady
Let me drink you please
I won't spill a drop, I promise you
Lying under this spell you cast on me
Each moment
The more I love you
Crush me
Come on
He brushes your brow with a kiss and moves back toward the stage.
It's crazy I'm thinking
Just knowing that the world is round
Here I'm dancing on the ground
Am I right side up or upside down
Is it real or am I dreaming
Adam stops just at the edge of the stage and instead of getting back up, he turns to gaze straight into your eyes once more.
Lovely lady I will treat you sweetly
Adore you
I mean
You crush me
It's times like these
When my faith I feel
And I know
How I love you
Come on
Lady
Adam closes his eyes, now singing really rock-star style. You take the opportunity to, you hope discreetly, fan yourself. You are avoiding looking at anyone, especially Jonathan, who you can see smiling in your peripheral vision.
It's crazy I'm thinking
Just as long as you're around
And here I'll be dancing on the ground
Am I right side up or upside down
To each other we'll be facing
By love we'll beat back the pain
we've found
Adam begins to take long deliberate strides toward you once again. Mad and embarrassed as you are, you must admit, Adam looks damn sexy and he's getting to you. You may even let him live after this.
You know
I mean to tell you all the things
I've been thinking deep inside
My friend
He comes to your knees and moves his legs just to the side of either of yours, almost straddling you. His hand goes to your cheek and he never breaks eye contact.
With each moment, the more I love you
Crush me
Come on
Lady
So much you have given love
That I would give you back
Again and again
Meaning I'll hold you
And please
Let me always
Adam brings his lips to yours, kissing you for all he's worth, and he is worth quite a bit. You faintly register the music dying, the swell of applause and a hearty chorus of "WHOO!!"'s from the crew members. He pulls back with a smile and extends his hand to you. You put your hand in his and stand. He bows to the audience and, at Adam's encouragement, you do the same. "Let's go up to our room Love," he whispers in your ear. You nod.
As you start to leave, Adam backs away from you a step. "Ladies and Gentlemen, Jonathan Creek!" He hands the microphone to a befuddled Jonathan and turns to escort you out. The spotlight swings on to Jonathan and the music swells once more. This time playing what you recognize as "Dancing Queen".
Jonathan rolls his eyes and puts the mike to his lips. "Adam, you bastard." Adam giggles lightly against your neck as you make your exit.
|
|
| The character of Adam Klaus and the show Jonathan Creek were created by David Renwick and are © the BBC. No infringement is intended and no profits are being made. |