“Of course it’s a good idea. It’s a great idea.” Buffy put as much enthusiasm in her voice as possible when completing a workout.
“Yeah, Will. Come on. It’s a chance to party. How many times do we get the opportunity to really get down!” Xander raised his voice to be heard above the music pouring out of Buffy’s CD player.
“Get down? Xander did you go and rent Boogie Nights again this weekend?” Buffy smiled when the male Slayerette ducked his head to avoid direct eye contact.
“I told you. I like the music.”
“A-anyway, it’s not like there’d be a lot of people there. I mean, it’ll be like any Saturday night. Just us, Cordy and Oz.”
Buffy sighed as she finished her routine. “The difference will be that it’ll be to celebrate your eighteenth birthday.” She walked over to her best friend. “Is it because of the surprise party you guys threw me last year?”
Willow hesitated, not wanting to hurt Buffy. “I didn’t want you to have bad memories. But, it’s not just that.”
“What’s not just that?” The three friends jumped at the intrusion of their conversation.
Buffy turned to her Watcher. “Geesh Giles, I wish you wouldn’t sneak up on people like that.”
“Buffy, the entire school faculty could enter the library while you’re playing that abomination, and you wouldn’t hear them.”
“Abomo what?”
“Abomination Xander. It means that claptrap that Buffy passes off as music.”
“I’ve told you before Giles. I will not do my exercises to Beethoven’s Fifth.”
“There are perfectly....”
“Er, guys. Can we have the music critics nightly meeting a little later?”
“Yes. Yes, of course. Now, what were the three of you discussing when I entered?”
“Willow’s eighteenth birthday party. We’re having one.”
“I haven’t said....”
“What a splendid idea. It will give you all a chance to relax and have some fun.”
“You too.” At Giles’ confused look, Buffy continued. “You’ll be there too.”
“When?”
“Saturday. We...” Buffy stopped as he Watcher’s face drained of blood, and a look of shock and utter desolation appeared. “Giles. What is it?”
He shook himself, as if to throw off a bad memory. “N-nothing. It’s nothing. Willow, I’m afraid I can’t attend your party. Something....something else must....excuse me.”
“Giles....” Buffy sighed as he ignored her call and continued out of the library. She turned to the others, their confusion as obvious as her own. “What was all that about?”
They both shook their heads. “Something upset him.”
“Yeah. And an upset Watcher does not a happy Slayer make. I think I need another talk with deep buried secrets guy.”
“Wouldn’t you be better off talking to Giles?”
“Xander! Buffy meant Giles.”
“Oh. I knew that.”
Chapter Two
“Willow! Wait up.” The next morning Buffy jogged to catch up to her friend as she entered the school grounds.
“Hey. How was the patrol last night?”
Buffy shrugged. “Dumb vampire woke up. Dumb vampire attacks. Dumb vampire gets dusted. Same old, same old.”
“Ah.” Willow nodded in understanding. After her stint of stand-in Slayerage, she couldn’t be so blasé, but whatever worked for Buffy. “Have you had a chance to talk to Giles yet?”
“No. But I will this morning. During my free period.” Buffy hesitated before broaching the next subject. “Will? What’s the real reason for not wanting a birthday party on Saturday?”
It was Willow’s turn to shrug. “It’s just that, well, some things are gonna be happening, and I don’t know....”
“If your parents want to throw you a party, just say so. We’d understand.”
“No. I told you, we’re gonna do our thing on Friday. For my actual birthday.” She turned to enter the school, then stopped again. “I’m gonna be getting a birthday present from my mother.”
“I should hope so. And your Dad. I told you what my Dad gave me.....”
“No. Not my Mom. My mother.” At Buffy’s look of confusion, she explained. “I’m adopted.”
Buffy felt her jaw drop in surprise. “You’re kidding. I never knew.”
“Come on, Buffy. Didn’t you ever wonder why I don’t have the same coloring as my parents?”
“Willow, your father’s follicle deficient. I kind of expected you not to take after him.” Buffy was happy to see an answering smile from her friend. “How long have you known?”
“All along. I just don’t talk about it. In fact, only Xander knows. The thing is, my natural mother left me a present of sorts. But I don’t get it until my eighteenth birthday.”
“Wow. What is it?”
Willow shrugged. “I don’t know. And it’s kind of wiggy, you know?” Buffy nodded in sympathy. “So, I don’t know how I’ll feel when, I mean, after Friday.”
“Well, let us know. If you don’t want to, then we won’t.” Just then the school bell rang. “I better go. If I’m more than five minutes late for class, I’m outta here, and I don’t want to explain to Giles and Mom why they have to go back to the school board to get me reinstated again.” She paused to rub her friend’s arm in sympathy. “It’ll be okay.”
“Yeah. Go on. You’ll be late.” Willow followed her running friend at a slower pace, wondering what Friday would bring.
Chapter Three
Giles gathered up some books and put them on the trolley. Some of the students actually used the library this morning, and he had to return the books to their appropriate place.
“Hey.”
He looked up at his visitor. “Buffy. How was class?”
“What? No how was patrol? How many vampires did you bag? Giles, aren’t we mixing up priorities here?”
He smiled. “If there was anything unusual last night, you would have informed me by now. And as we’re so close to the end of the year, your subsequent graduation does have some measure of priority.”
“Okay. Well, both went fine, anyway. Thanks for asking.” She sat on the study table, ignoring his frown. “Giles? What’s happening Saturday?”
“What?”
“Why can’t you come to Willow’s birthday party?” She recognized the signs of ‘lets evade this as much as we can’ and decided to preempt his response. “Come on. You know I’ll worm it out of you eventually. Besides. After Eyghon, we agreed, remember. No more secrets.”
“We didn’t agree. You commanded. And, this has no affect on you or my duties as a Watcher.”
“But it affects you. Come on. What gives?”
He sighed, then moved toward the table. When he was seated, he looked meaningfully at Buffy. She took the hint, and moved to one of the chairs.
Giles paused, his thoughts going inwards as a deep melancholy overtook him. “You remember when we buried Jenny? I said that as a Watcher, she was the first person I buried that I loved?” Buffy nodded, wondering where this was leading. “Well, that wasn’t quite true. Although I wasn’t officially a Watcher at the time, I had to bury somebody else I loved. Actually, two people.”
Buffy leaned forward, shaken by the terrible sadness in his voice and eyes. She wanted to comfort him, tell him everything would be allright. But she knew she couldn’t. Instead, she moved her hand over to cover his. He squeezed it in gratitude.
“After I’d finished my studies at Oxford, I returned home for a spell. It was.... a disaster. My father hadn’t forgiven me for my stupidity, and I was getting tired of trying to prove myself to him. Whenever we met, we clashed. And then, there was Emma.”
“Emma?” She wondered at the reverence with which he said the woman’s name, and the gentle smile that crossed his face.
“She was my father’s Slayer. Well, the girl he was training to be a Slayer. He was sure she would be the next one.” Buffy gasped in surprise. “Oh yes. Sometimes, we get lucky, and we know if a girl is to become a Slayer. That was the case with Kendra. And, with Emma.” He paused, removing his glasses to polish them.
“Would you rather not....”
“No. No, it’s allright. Now I’ve started, I want to finish.” He replaced the glasses and reclaimed Buffy’s hand. He needed the warmth of human contact. “When I met her, Emma was eighteen. The same age as you. She was beautiful. Unspoiled. Dedicated. My father pushed her mercilessly. He wanted to make sure she was completely ready. I suppose we turned to each other out of sympathy at first. After all, I was eight years older than her. It seemed a generation then. By the end of the summer, I was in love with her.”
Buffy thought she could see where this was going. “Was she called?”
“No. She might have been, if ..... well if things had been different. You see, we became lovers. I was her first. She’d been so sheltered, she hadn’t had any contact with boys. We used to sneak away when my father was elsewhere. At night, after he’d retired, she’d come to my room. I asked her to marry me. I wanted to confront my father with the truth. She wouldn’t let me. I realised later that she was frightened of him. A few weeks later she disappeared.”
Chapter Four
“Disappeared? What do you mean?”
“I mean, one morning she wasn’t there. She ran away. My father confronted me. Demanded to know what was going on. I told him. Blamed him for making her run away. And he blamed me. For months, we didn’t talk to each other. The only thing we came together for was our search for Emma.”
“Did you find her?”
“Eventually. My father did. In a hospital.” He looked up at her face, tears gathering in her eyes. “I also found out why she ran away. She was pregnant. Carrying my child. She’d been so terrified of my father that she preferred to disappear from both our lives than tell me. The hospital called. She’d put us down as next of kin. She’d gone into labor. They weren’t sure if she or the child would make it.”
Buffy felt her own tears falling. She already knew the end of the story, but didn’t stop him. He needed to get it out of his system. Instead, she moved her other hand to cover both of his.
“My father took the call. He didn’t tell me. Just rushed straight over there. Fortunately, the housekeeper had overheard the conversation. She finally told me the truth, and I rushed over there. I was too late. My love and my daughter had died. And I wasn’t there with them.” He stopped, gasping for breathe as the remembered pain threatened to overwhelm him. “My father was there, furious. He blamed me. Accused me of taking away his one chance of having a real Slayer. Said I’d killed her. He even refused me the opportunity to say goodbye. To hold them in my arms. They’d already been taken to the morgue.”
“Oh god, Giles. How could he?”
“Oh, he thought he was in the right. In his eyes, I’d ..... we’d betrayed him and everything he’d worked toward. I left the house that night. We met at Emma ’s funeral. There was just the two of us there. I never saw him after that. And I never forgave him.”
“When did this happen?” She thought she knew, but she had to make sure.
“Eighteen years on Friday.” He pulled his hands from hers, wiping any tell-tale wetness from his face. “So you see, I can’t go to the party. It’s just too....much.”
“I understand. And so will the others.” She paused, struck by something. “It’s funny. Willow just told me she was adopted. Strange coincidence, huh?”
Giles stopped, arrested by a horrifying thought. It was impossible. Too many variables. Besides, his child had died. His father had..... He realised he ’d been too silent. Buffy was looking at him strangely. “Yes. Quite a coincidence.”
Chapter Five
Over the next few days, Giles’ behavior became increasingly bizarre. He spent less time in the library. When Buffy grilled him, all he said was that he’d had to make a few phone calls and hadn’t wanted to use the school phone system. And when he did make an appearance, he seemed distracted. Distant. Especially toward Willow. The gang decided it was because it was almost the anniversary of his lover and baby’s death, and because Willow’s birthday was on the same date. They figured she reminded him of the fact that his own child should have been eighteen too.
Willow also, was acting a little strange. Only Buffy and Xander knew the cause for her concern, and they didn’t know how to comfort her. They could only let her know they were there for her, and would support her no matter what happened on Friday.
On Thursday evening, Giles received the information he was waiting for. He sat down on his couch, buried his head in his hands and wept. Wept for them all. He now knew the truth. And it didn’t make anything easier. He had no idea how he was going to make it through the next few days.
On Friday morning, Giles went to the library a little earlier. He made his customary cup of tea, then sat and waited.
At 8:30 the doors to the library burst open. A very distraught Willow stood there, an envelope crushed in her hand. He rose. He had no idea what was in the envelope, but he could guess. He didn’t know how to help her. There was only one thing he could do, and he hoped it was the correct action. “I don’t know why I hadn’t realised before. You look so much like her.”
As if his words were a release, she burst into tears, then threw herself into his waiting arms. Giles crushed her to him, whispering meaningless words of comfort and love. Fifteen minutes later, Buffy and Xander, having received calls from Willow’s distraught parents, found them in the same position. He looked up as they entered, his own face awash with tears. “I’d like you both to meet my daughter.”
Chapter Six
They were all sitting around the table. Giles had persuaded Willow to call her parents to reassure them, and then he’d forced her to drink a cup of sweet tea. After he felt she’d calmed enough, he explained what he’d found out.
“After Buffy and I talked the other day, I wondered at the coincidence of there being an adopted girl with the same birthdate as my own daughter. So I did some digging. I didn’t have the results until last night.”
“Why didn’t you say something?”
He looked over at his Slayer. “Because I thought I was crazy. Clutching at straws. I thought you’d feel the same. And, I wanted to make sure before mentioning anything.” He turned to Willow. “Did Buffy tell you my story?” At her nod, he sighed with relief. At least he wouldn’t have to repeat that. “Did you know your parents spent some time in England?”
“No.” She was surprised at that. But, of course, it made sense. How else would they have adopted her?
“I think I better start...well, not at the beginning. After Emma left the house, she wanted to disappear. Completely. She knew I’d look for her, and didn’t want me to find her. She was so terrified of what my father would do to the baby.” He shook his head. “She should have known I would protect them both. Anyway, she met up with some, um, hippies. There were still a few communes around at the time.”
“Communes, as in free love and let’s converse with nature buck-naked communes?”
Both Giles and Willow smiled at Xander’s comment. It helped to ease the tension. “Not quite that bad. It was an alternate lifestyle, but mainly of the commune with nature type. And, I believe they kept their clothes on. Emma became particularly friendly with a young American couple stopping there. They had planned to return home, but when they realised Emma was pregnant, and on her own, they decided to stay at least until the baby was born. They didn’t ask any questions, but it was obvious she was in some kind of trouble.”
“How do you know this?”
“I found somebody else who was at the commune. I traced your parents’ history and found the link with Emma there. It was why neither I, my father, or the Watcher Council could find her. Anybody at the commune just simply didn’t exist in society. She stayed there until just before the baby was born. The Rosenburgs took excellent care of her, and she came to rely on them completely. Perhaps she had a premonition. I don’t know. But she begged them to look after her baby if anything happened to her. They agreed.”
“What happened?”
“She went into premature labor. Nobody knows why. But the baby came early. By the time they got Emma to the hospital, she’d already lost a lot of blood. Unbeknownst to the Rosenburgs, the hospital called my father. Fortunately, we lived several miles from the hospital. It’s at least a four hour journey there. That’s how long it took me.” He paused, once again reliving those terrible moments. “In the end, Emma was too weak. She reminded the Rosenburgs of their promise, then died holding our baby daughter. The Rosenburgs explained to the hospital that they were the adoptive parents, and wanted to take the baby back to America. She was moved to a London hospital. By the time my father turned up, they’d gone. He knew the truth, but decided to punish me by telling me they’d both died at birth.”
All three of the Slayerettes gasped at that. “Why?” It was Willow who voiced the question they all wanted answered.
“I don’t know. As I said, he wanted to punish me. He didn’t want to acknowledge my and Emma’s relationship. Perhaps he didn’t want anything to interfere with my Watcher training. I’d like to believe he hoped to protect his granddaughter by not allowing her to learn he destiny. But I just don’t know.”
Willow shivered at the cold-heartedness of a man who would do that to his own son. Then she realised he’d done it to her too. And suddenly, she was fiercely glad he’d not gone after her. God knows what she might have turned out like.
Xander pointed to the envelope still crushed in Willow’s hand. “What’s that Will?”
She looked down. “It’s a birthday present. From my mother. My birth certificate.” She gave it to Giles. He opened it up and pulled the certificate out. There under Father was his own name. He silently thanked his Emma for this chance.
“So what happens now? I mean to you two.”
He looked toward Buffy, then Willow. “I don’t know. Willow already has two very loving parents. I hope that she, and they, will allow me to be a part of her life. But I don’t have the right of a father.”
Willow acknowledged the truth in his words. But had her own counter-argument. “Well, I do have a Dad. But I don’t have a Father. And Mom and Dad both said they wanted you to come over for dinner. Tonight. Will you?”
Giles looked at her with gratitude. Was he truly being given a second chance? “I’d like that. Thank you.” He was surprised to note her look of relief. Did she really think he would reject her?
“Giles?” He looked at Buffy. “What happened to your father?”
“Nothing. He’s still alive. And still waiting for the chance to be the Watcher who has a Slayer.”
Willow almost pitied the older man. But she could never forgive him for what he did to his son. Her father. She decided to cheer the atmosphere a little. “Guys. I’ve decided I want my birthday party after all. But only if.....if my father comes too.” She reached her hand to his, and was rewarded by his gentle smile and loving grip.