He sat on the chair, resting the guitar against his knee. The silence of the hotel room was beginning to get to him, and he felt like adding some noise. It had been impractical to remain on Buffy's couch, and he really needed his space, but he missed the sounds of the girls as they moved around the house. He even missed Dawn's mumbling as she was forced to get up in the morning. The hotel was standard tourist fare. Better than the rundown motel Faith called home, but still within his current slightly strained finances. He didn't begrudge giving Buffy the money, but it wouldn't make things very easy for him in the next few months. He began strumming the guitar strings, trying to find a tune that suited his mood. Finally something hit. He wasn't sure he remembered the song, but it seemed familiar somehow. He began humming along:
'Torn once more from my home How long must I continue to roam Living in her shadow, waiting for her warmth yet she chills me with her icy embrace.
She thinks she fools us all with her smiles yet I'd long ago learnt to look through her wiles Does she think that I don't see in her eyes We haven't said the last of our goodbyes'
The tempo picked up slightly, the tune adjusting as he allowed himself to flow with the words
'After all these years she still doesn't know What it cost me to stay and help her grow How many times have I given up my life Followed her from the light and into the night How many times must I change who I am Before I'm given the chance to be just a man'
He changed to a rock beat as he remembered his youth
'As Ripper I ruled London town At my word they would've burnt the place down I coulda been a rock and roll star With my talents they said I'd go far Brought forth the dark magics and watch the flames fan yeah, I could have turned out stronger than Ethan'
Giles paused, giggling at the thought of wanting to be like Ethan. But the song kept calling. He chose a more classical theme.
'Accepted back into the fold Forgiveness can be so cold But for her I would do it and more To make amends for what went before How many times must I change who I am Before I'm given the chance to be just a man
Lost in the comfort of leather and ink Surrounded by old friends to comfort and warm Give me a job to keep me from harm How could they know it was where I wanted to be Hide myself where nobody could ever see Till they came and ordered me away To this land of sun and endless day How many times must I change who I am Before I'm given the chance to be just a man'
Hearing a knock at the door, Giles placed his guitar against his chair and rose to answer it. The sound of an orchestra continuing the strains of the song barely registered as he opened the door. Two room service waiters entered with a trolley cart, performing a ballet that only they understood. Moving about the room in co-ordinated actions they prepared the table and pushed a chair in front of it. While one of the waiters uncovered the meal, the other stood beside Giles as the tempo of the music increased and the Englishman began speaking, his words in tempo with the music.
'She never wanted me here Kept me away from fear Wanted to lead the team in a cheer Before she even drank the beer Led me a merry dance Wanted a life of her own That I gave up mine she didn't care Why did I ever leave there'
The waiter presented Giles with a receipt as he listened to the Englishman's words in sympathy. Giles signed for the meal as he continued his lament
'Once I was all she had When her Angel went bad She needed me then Way back when Doesn't it make you sad Now I'm just handy wants me to play Daddy While she plays with the vampire Can't keep from the fire She's already tried it with the sire'
The two waiters nodded and then high kicked out of the room. Giles closed the door then sighed. The music changed again, becoming more melancholy.
'And yet I'm exptected to stand and wait Hoping one day she'll look my way I'd play father, son, and more for her If only she saw me once as a man'
He moved toward the table, pulling the chair out.
'I know I live in a fool's paradise I feel her pain and it feeds on my own She has a new role for me to play And no is the one word to her I can' t say How many times must I change who I am Before I'm given the chance to be just a man'
He sat down, staring morosely down at his meal. The music rose to a crescendo before a few final notes were played.
'How many times must she change who I am Before she gives me the chance to be just a man'
THE END
He sighed once more, lifted the fork, and began eating.