Gripping her crossbow in her hands more tightly, she moved on with a more determined step. She would not lose this time. The dim glow of the crystals within the rock wall ensured some lighting, at least enough to make sure she didn't bump into an immovable object. So she could concentrate on her target, her senses telling her it was near.
She wasn't sure how long she'd been tracking this particular beast. It felt like hours, most of which had been spent traipsing through this damp labyrinth. Now she was working on pure adrenaline. It had become a contest between the two of them. Not of strength but of cunning and perseverance. She'd almost given up a few times, but she sensed she was now winning.
The scrape of flesh against a stone behind her caused her to swing her head. Listening carefully, she couldn't discern any other noise. Side-stepping slightly, she pushed her slim body into a crevice, guaranteeing protection of her back. With any luck her quarry wouldn't realize she was there until it was too late.
A few minutes later her patience was rewarded. The shuffling of a lumbering body, some heavy breathing as if the approaching being was beyond their endurance notified her that the end was near. Timing her move perfectly, she stepped out onto the path, turned toward her surprised quarry and fired. Moving quickly to reload, in a matter of seconds she raised her primed crossbow to fire off her second shot and looked into a pair of pain-filled green eyes.
Holding his hand toward her, Giles was only able to whisper her name as he succumbed to the mortal wound.
Willow quietly pushed the door shut, glancing toward her roommate. Moving toward her chest of drawers she placed her towel and toothbrush on the top. Turning at a sound, she was relieved to see movement in the other bed. "At last. I thought you'd never wake up."
Too tired to respond Buffy stretched, considered rolling over and going back to sleep, then sat up. There wasn't much point in trying. She had a feeling Willow wouldn't let her sleep the day away. She pushed the hair back away from her face, a look of confusion coming over her face. The sun shone through the blinds, indicating exactly how long she had been asleep.
Willow tried to mask her concern for her friend. Buffy was never a morning person, but this was bad for her. "That was some dream you had last night." Buffy looked up sharply, surprise evident on her features. "I heard you cry out."
"Yeah, well it was pretty freaky." Swinging her legs over the side, Buffy levered her weight onto her hands, preparing to stand.
"Do you think it was a prophecy?"
"No!" At the look of shock on Willow's face, Buffy tempered her reaction. "No, it was just a nightmare."
"W-well maybe you should tell Giles."
"No." Buffy's voice was firm. "I don't want to bother him with it. And I don 't want you to. It was just a dream Willow." She finally rose, gathering her toiletries. "Besides, I don't think he needs to be bothered right now."
Willow sighed as the door closed behind Buffy. Something in that dream really wigged her out. She was right about Giles though. Olivia wasn't coming back, so he didn't need anything else to upset him. She sighed again as she started to change. What was it with the gang and romance anyway? Giles and Olivia, her and Oz, Buffy and Riley. About the only couple that seemed to be doing okay was Xander and Anya. "And that's weird enough to not even go there."
Rupert Giles sat in front of his television, watching the morning news. Another gruesome murder, by person or persons unknown. One advantage of his purchase, he was able to catch up on all the happenings around town. Just about his only source now. He certainly wasn't getting much help from the others.
He closed his eyes as he attempted to drive the bitterness from his mind. He knew it wasn't Buffy's fault that Olivia wouldn't be returning. Or the others. It was just that he was so bored. At least when Jenny had died, he'd had something to do to take his mind off his pain.
Jenny. Two years and the pain was still there. Not as fresh, but he doubted it would ever go away fully. How could it when he was constantly reminded of the circumstances? He didn't blame Buffy, truly he didn't. But a part of him could not forgive the way they all seemed to have forgotten her sacrifice.
Knowing that such thoughts would only lead him to a familiar state of depression, he rose and turned off the television. He considered calling Buffy. Unless things were dire, he wouldn't see her unless he made the first move. He even missed Spike. Not that the vampire wasn't a pain in the butt, but at least he was better than talking to oneself. And Giles had a feeling that wasn't far behind.
A knock on his door broke his reflections. Curiously, he went to let whomever it was in. It would be none of the children. They didn't bother to knock any more. After all, it wasn't as though they'd ever be interrupting anything important. Damn, there was that bitterness again. Get a hold of yourself Rupert. Pasting a polite smile on his face, he opened the door to his visitor. "Yes?" Something about the young man seemed familiar. "Yo-you' re Buffy's friend aren't you? Riley?"
The young man nodded. "Hi. I was wondering if you knew where Buffy was."
"No, I'm afraid I don't." As he remembered his manners, Giles stepped back. "Won't you come in?"
"Thanks." As he walked past the older man Riley looked around curiously. His eyes lit on the books, itching to get his hands on them. From what Buffy had told him, there would be some information his organization would find really useful. "I thought Buffy might be here researching."
"Researching?" Head down, Giles followed Riley into the living room, his hands in his pocket. "That's right. Buffy said you'd discovered the truth. I 'm afraid Buffy isn't much of a researcher. More of a doer."
"You do know about the attacks last night?"
"The murder? Yes, I've just heard it on the news. Is it demon related?"
"The victim was torn to shreds."
"Well, that's a nice image to swallow with breakfast." They both turned to look at the young woman standing in the doorway. "Hey Riley. I take it this is business?"
Riley nodded, his disappointment not showing. "Yeah. Looks like we've got trouble. Thought you might want to work together on this one."
"Together?" Buffy's look of surprise was laden with mockery. "And how together will we be when I try to kill the demon and you decide to protect it?"
"Hey Riley." Willow pushed past her friend, whispering, "Play nice."
"So this is the great Riley Finn." Xander sauntered up to the other young man, looking him up and down. "I hear you're pretty good with the old hand to hand combat."
Riley looked more confused than imitated. "Well, yeah. Have to be to fight the demons. They're usually bigger and stronger than me."
"Yeah. I can see the logic in that." Xander the brave backed off, making a beeline toward the kitchen.
Giles looked inquiringly at Buffy. "Counsel of war?"
She shrugged. "We heard about the murder on campus. Thought it might be demon related."
"It is. We have an eye-witness." Riley stepped forward. "Big ugly thing with a tail."
"Now why aren't demons ever good looking?" Nobody bothered to respond to Buffy's query. "So you got a description of the demon? Any idea what it is?"
Giles moved toward his books. "This should make it easier. Once we know the type of..."
"Not yet. They're working on it back at the lab. I should have an answer when I get back."
"Buffy maybe this is related to your dream last night. Sorry." The last at the glare Buffy gave Willow.
"Dream?" Giles moved back to the couch where the girls were sat. "You had a dream? A prophecy?"
"No. Just a dream."
"Wait. You have prophecy's?" Buffy glance at Riley before turning back to Giles.
"You don't know. Sometimes your dreams don't appear to be related."
"Giles, trust me. It isn't anything to do with the demon."
"I think you should tell me.."
"God, will you at least let me have my dreams to myself?" There was an awkward moment's silence until Buffy turned back to Riley. "You say your people will know who the demon is by now?"
"Yeah."
"Well we better go then." Rising she moved toward the front door. "Coming guys?"
"Civilians? I don't know."
Buffy spun, almost bumping into Riley's chest. "We're a package deal. You want me, you also get Willow and Xander."
Giles tried not to wince at the lack of his name in her sentence. "I'll just get my jacket."
"That's okay. We're onto it." Buffy glanced briefly at Giles before turning back toward the door. "No need for you to be involved in this one."
"Bye Giles!" Willow was too busy running to catch up with Buffy to notice Giles' reaction. Xander, still trying to prove his masculinity to the new player, hurried to catch up with the others. As the door shut behind them, Giles found himself not only alone once more, but suddenly not even wanted.
"Just One Girl." As the elevator started it's downward journey, Riley turned to look at his fellow passengers. "Sorry about all the Cloak and Dagger stuff. Maggie'll kill me if I showed you where our headquarters."
"Maggie?" Willow's squeak was slightly muffled by the blindfold covering the upper half of her face to the top of her mouth. Buffy and Xander, also blindfolded, turned toward the sound.
"Yeah, you're gonna find out anyway so I don't suppose it matters. Maggie Walsh is the leader of this section."
"Can I take my blindfold off now, cause I'm feeling kinda silly. It's not like we can see anything in the elevator?" Xander raised his hands halfway to his mask in anticipation of the other man's response.
Riley sighed. "I suppose it won't hurt. But when Maggie asks, we waited until just before the doors opened, right?"
The others murmured their assent as they removed their blindfolds. Xander was right. There was nothing to see, just a square box taking them further down into the bowels of the earth. Into an area where none of them had any control over what would happen. The three friends looked toward each other with a little trepidation in their eyes.
The elevator slowed to a stop, the doors swinging open a few seconds later. Willow stepped back at the sight before them. Half a dozen young men stood facing them, guns drawn and at the ready. Professor Walsh stood before them, and by the look on her face Riley was not going to be welcome with open arms. What was truly shocking though was the activity behind the young soldiers. The corridor seemed to stretch for miles, and was at least half a football field wide. And all around was activity. Scientists, more soldiers, large transport vehicles. It was obvious that this wasn't a recent addition to the underground activities of Sunnydale.
"You better have a good reason for bringing civilians here Finn."
Riley saluted to attention, ignoring his companions completely. "The slayer has agreed to work with us, but she refused to come alone."
Professor Walsh looked toward Buffy with her eyebrows raised. Buffy returned the look, tilting her head slightly in defiance. "If you can't obey a direct order, then we may have trouble in the future."
"I haven't said there is a future." Buffy glanced at Riley before moving closer to the Professor. "I'm here to stop the demon, that's all. Riley thought we'd get better results if we worked together."
Professor Walsh nodded. "Fair enough. Let's get to work." She turned on her heel, walking past the soldiers now standing at ease."
Willow lifted her hand in greeting to the men she recognized before trotting to catch up to the others. Riley flanked Professor Walsh's right, whilst Buffy walked at her left. Xander stayed slightly behind Buffy, literally watching her back. As Willow moved beside him, Riley's friend Forrest joined her.
"There was a report last night of a mutilation..."
"Severed limbs, blood everywhere, heads missing. Yeah I know." Professor Walsh was obviously annoyed at Buffy's interruption. "Do you know what caused it?"
"A demon of some kind. From the description the computer has narrowed it down to two possible candidates." She stopped in front of a large computer console, picking up a folder resting on the top. Passing a drawing to Buffy, she continued. "This one is a ravager demon. Moves into town, causes havoc, kills some people and moves on."
Buffy looked at the image before her. The blue scales on the demon added to the feeling of slime caused by the look on the monster's face. The red eyes looked almost maniacal, and the large protruding teeth appeared ready to bite anything that came near enough. A tale approximately two feet long dropped behind the demon, its forked tip resting on what would be the ground. "Well, it's ugly enough to scare people to death."
"This is the other one." Buffy took the second picture. Other than green flesh, the most remarkable difference was in the eyes. They looked almost sad. "There isn't much known about this one. It appears rarely, but wherever it is death follows. And there's at least one disappearance."
"So much for the sadness." At the querying looks of the others, "Never mind. Which one is it?"
Walsh looked uncomfortable. "The computer can't give a hundred percent answer."
"Maybe we should go ask," at Buffy's look Willow changed tact, "our friend. The one who has all the books."
"Who?" Professor Walsh looked toward Riley. He just shrugged, although he had a suspicion who they were talking about.
"Just somebody who collects books. And there's no need for them to be brought in." Buffy gave both Willow and Xander a warning look before returning to the Professor. "Well, can your computer guess?"
The older woman nodded. "Yes. The green one, with a sixty percent certainty. Not good I know, but the nearest we can get."
"Well," Buffy put the pictures back on the computer console, "let's go kick some demon butt."
The joint was hopping, or so they say. Trouble with the regular clientele of Willy's bar, that usually meant that somebody or something had ripped off another patron's leg. Not that Willy was gonna argue with them. Oh no, they could do what they liked as long as the tab was paid at the end of the night. No it wasn't the regulars that worried him. It was the guy, definitely of the human variety, sitting at the end of his bar that was his concern.
Wiping the top absently, the owner and bartender made his way to his new customer. The guy had rolled in just before sundown, already pretty worse for wear. Now, three hours later, he was sure gonna have a hangover in the morning. Trouble was, he thought he knew the guy. "Should you be here? I mean, it's not the wisest place for one of you to be hangin' around."
The guy lifted his head up, concentrating heavily on bringing the bartender in front of him in focus. It took a while to realize that without his glasses that wasn't going to happen. "One of me?"
"Yeah. You know," Willy leaned in closer, not wanting one of the regulars to hear, "one of the good guys."
"One of the good guys." The man straightened as enlightenment dawned. "Oh yes. One of the, um. Never mind." He shoved the glass at Willy. "Get me another one."
"Hey, I don't mind what you do. Honest." Willy looked around again. "But I don't want the slayer after my ass."
The old guy laughed. "That's one thing you won't have to worry about." He pointed his finger at the sympathetic bartender for emphasis. "For the slayer to come after you, she would have to care. And she's made it quite obvious she doesn't care. After all, what am I to her now?" Unfortunately, he'd also increased his voice, ensuring that all the occupants of the room heard him. Even he noticed the deathly silence that followed his statement.
Willy swallowed audibly and knew he was probably about to commit professional suicide. Better than the slayer coming after him. Raising his own voice, he looked around as he spoke. "Well, you're her watcher an' all. I suppose she wouldn't like it if anybody came near you." As he expected, half the room emptied. The other half went back to what it was doing, keeping a watchful eye on the human at the bar.
"Watcher. Don't even have that hold over her now. Nope, have nothing to offer her. Nothing she wants anyway. Retired and thrown on the rubbish tip. And I'm not even forty five." At least this was said much quieter. "She doesn't want or need me. She's found somebody else to do the research now. And that was all I had left to do." He lowered his head as he went to take another drink.
"Do you know, there's nothing more depressing than a maudlin drunk." The newcomer walked up to the watcher, resting his hand on the other's wrist. He nodded at Willy. "That's alright, I'll take care of him. I'll make sure none of your other patrons kill him tonight." After a hesitant nod, Willy walked away. The newcomer looked down at Giles, who was staring at him open-mouthed. He smiled. "Hallo Ripper."
"Ethan." Giles straightened up slightly, his stance and demeanor showing he wasn't as drunk as he projected. "What ill wind brought you in here? And why shouldn't I kill you right now?"
His former friend looked warily around the room. "I'd say right now the answer to the first is the same as the second. Our fellow patrons are not happy to have you here. Come on." Ethan grabbed the other man's arm and tried to pull him to a standing position. He grimaced as Giles collapsed back on the barstool. "You're going to have to help me here Ripper. You're not as light as you used to be, and I'm not as versatile. I can't carry you this time."
Giles shook his head as if to clear it. "Oh God," running his hand wearily down his face, he began to rise, "I'm a bloody fool. Lead on MacDuff." So saying, he turned and followed Ethan toward a door at the rear of the building, his step weaving only slightly. They paused only once as Ethan collected a bottle and two glasses from Willie, making sure Giles had enough to pay for it.
Giles stumbled into the small room, taking in the table and chairs, as well as the various magic paraphernalia. "I see you've been making yourself at home Ethan." He turned back to find the other man chanting and marking the closed door. "What are you doing?"
Ethan didn't pause in his casting, answering Giles only when he'd finished. "Ensuring that demons don't have an open invitation to this room. I promised our patron I'd keep you alive tonight." He moved toward the table, placing the glasses upon the surface before opening the bottle. "Now then Ripper," he poured a generous amount into the first glass, "if memory serves me right you're a miserable drunk. But when you're plastered," the second glass received equal proportion, Ethan pausing as he placed the bottle on the table, "or receive other less inhibiting substance," he picked up both glasses, handing one to Giles, "why you become my old comrade in arms again. Ready to cause havoc upon the earth." Tipping his own glass in salute, he downed it in one swallow. Giles shrugged, then lifted his drink to his lips.
Buffy sighed for the tenth time in an hour, this time making sure her companion heard her. Riley's irritated look was reward for her effort, although he continued concentrating on the device in his hand. Lots of beeps coming from the thing, but nothing to show them the way. "So, what's this phosphorous thingy again?"
Riley opened his mouth to correct her pronunciation for the fifth time, then realised the futility of it. "It tracks down the creatures scent. Each living creature has a unique make up."
"DNA. Yeah I know that one."
"But that's only part of it. There's also your scent, the way you walk, your lifestyle. They all add up to create a chemical mix that is uniquely yours. This tracks that formula. First we track on the known general makeup of the creature we're hunting, then we narrow it down as we get more samples of the creature's phosphor.." He hesitated as he realised he was going to use the same word as Buffy. "Well, that's the theory anyway."
"Too bad nobody told this demon that." Buffy's frustration was evident. Willow and Xander had gone with separate teams to search other quadrants, to no avail. The strongest tail had come from the area they were now patrolling, but that had also petered out. Even with their scientific know-how and technical gadgets, the Initiative hadn't been able to find this demon. Instead, Buffy felt as though she'd wasted a whole evening. "Look, it 's getting late. I'm going to patrol the cemeteries for any stray vamps, and then I'll call it a night. Maybe we'll have better luck next time."
Riley nodded, knowing she was right. "I'll call off the other teams. See you tomorrow?"
"'kay. Night." They looked at each other a few seconds longer, before turning away and walking into the night.
The original bottle lay on the table, it's clear glass reflecting the stains and watermarks upon the wooden surface. Beside it stood a second bottle, already two thirds down. Two tumblers slammed upon the table-top within a few seconds of each other. "My win!"
"Was not!"
"Come on, Ethan. You were always a bad loser."
"Only when I don't lose. I finished first. You're getting slow in your old age Ripper." Both men slurred their words, their bodies weaving slightly as they spoke. Their skulling game had gone on for almost an hour now, and Giles was indeed beating Ethan. Just. Some things did not change with age.
At Ethan's words Giles paused, a look of melancholy on his face. Ethan swore to himself as he waited for what he knew would come next. "I am old. Just an old man who keeps getting in their way. They don't need me. Do they?" He peered myopically at his old friend, a look of hope in his eyes. "It's not my fault I'm not nineteen any more is it?"
Ethan sighed, then smiled as a thought came. Reaching into his bag, he pulled out the ingredients he needed. "Of course it isn't. And I bet if you were nineteen those kids wouldn't keep up with you." He glanced up to see if Giles was watching what he was doing, but the other man was lost in his melancholy.
"I guess they just don't think we have anything in common. And they're growing so fast. They've moved away from me now. They don't need me. She doesn't need me, not now she has the Initiative."
Ethan finished rolling the herbs into the paper, then licked the end down. Twisting one of the open ends slightly, he handed it over to Giles. "Here, this should cheer you up." Giles jerked up a little, then took the joint and placed it in his mouth. Ethan turned away slightly, muttering to himself.
Giles pulled the joint out of his mouth, wavering it about. "I bet she wouldn't even notice if I'd disappeared." He started patting the pockets of his jacket and pants, sighing in satisfaction when he extracted a lighter. He indicated it to the other man, who continued muttering to himself. "In fact," he paused to light the open end of the joint, drawing back until he saw the slight flare, "probably the only way I could get her to notice me is if," he drew in a mouthful of the drug, allowing it to fill his lungs as memories of other times reminded him of the rush he was about to feel, "I became a demon."
Ethan finished his muttering and turned around, smiling as he smelled the distinctive aroma of a good crop of marijuana. "No say 'I wish I was nineteen again.' Trust me on this."
Giles smiled, and duly repeated, "I wish I was nineteen again." He then took another drag on the joint before passing it onto Ethan.
Giles groaned as he slowly turned over. Waiting a few moments for the sledgehammers pounding against his head to ease, he took stock of his surroundings. Last thing he remembered was leaving Ethan for a visit to the loo, and then being overcome by a wave of dizziness. Now, he was lying in a dark alley, the air redolent with an aroma he didn't even want to think about, the ground covered in fifth and litter.
Praying that the sledgehammers had finished their work for the night, he slowly moved into an upright position, wondering vaguely why his body felt so heavy. Deciding it was a side-effect of the excessive drink and drugs he' d taken, he made his way gingerly out of the alley.
A dim streetlight illuminated the empty road before him. He recognized part of Sunnydale's commercial district, a ghostlike aura about it without any of the businesses open. He noticed some were also boarded up and secured by steel gates. Did the owners really think that would stop the evil that would do damage just for the fun of it? Using the walls of the buildings for support, he made his way down the road, and towards the park a few blocks down.
He'd just reached the edge of the woods when he noticed a figure weaving its way through the trees ahead. Recognizing the blond tresses of the slayer, he walked toward her, knowing that there was something definitely wrong with him.
Noticing she was moving further away from him, he called her name. "Buffy! Over here!" He sighed in relief when she turned toward him. Too eager to speak to her to wonder why she was running toward him, he rushed to tell her his news. "Something seems wrong. I'm afraid I might be pois.oof." He doubled over as her fist connected with his stomach. Before he could recover, he felt her foot on his chin, knocking him back on the ground. "Buffy what.?" She came at him again, spinning in a move he'd always admired before kicking him in the ribs. He roared in pain.
Buffy'd worked herself to a fury as the roar echoed over the park. "Go ahead. Scream. It isn't like anybody will come to help you. Do you know how much of my time you've wasted?"
Giles twisted away from her approaching foot, only his knowledge of her fighting method saving him from another beating. Fighting through the pain where she'd already made contact, he let his rage take control. Roaring once more, he swung out, his arm knocking Buffy back. Taking advantage of the momentary respite, he rose and limped out of the park. By the time Buffy had recovered he'd managed to evade her.
Panting, Giles made his way along the street, hoping to reach his apartment safely. Not only was he in considerable pain, he was confused and hurt. Why had she attacked him like that? It didn't make sense. But then, nothing about their relationship made sense any more.
A reflection to his right caught his eye. Turning slowly, he looked into the storefront window. His roar, "Ethan!" echoed loudly through the deserted streets. Before him stood one of the things he feared and loathed. The blue scales of the demon shimmered in the dim lighting, its eyes glowing back at him. But what was most terrifying was the image was of himself.
She knew it. As soon as the demon had gotten away the previous night, Buffy had known that Walsh would ride her. And she was right. Walsh spent five minutes telling Buffy why one of her teams would have succeeded where she'd failed. And for the past fifteen minute debrief, several mentions of her 'letting the ST go' had ensured the rest of the team got it too. She looked toward Willow and Xander, both of whom were giving her sympathetic looks. She shrugged. The only other option was to go to see Giles, and she couldn't do that. No matter what they thought, she had her reasons. She shivered as she remembered the main reason.
"Buffy, if you've finished your day-dreaming, perhaps we can start our search for the day?" Walsh put as much condescention into her voice as possible.
Buffy sat up straighter in the chair. "Sorry."
"Now, same teams as before. Agent Finn will assign you to your appropriate areas. Keep alert people. Buffy has confirmed which demon we're after, and it's dangerous."
Buffy almost felt like adding a 'Yea me," but knew it wouldn't be appreciated. Shrugging, she joined Xander and Willow as they waited for Riley and his team to get ready. "Well that was only slightly more fun than getting your teeth pulled."
"Without anasthetic." Buffy smiled briefly at Xander's contribution.
"Buffy, we could always.."
"No we can't." Buffy knew Willow well enough to anticipate what she was saying. "Trust me Willow, this is the best option."
"Right," Riley walked up to the three friends, "we're doing sector 5A." At their blank looks, "near the old High School, through the sewers."
"Where the cave formations are?" Buffy tried to keep the tremor from her voice. She knew she wasn't successful by the looks of concern she received.
"Yeah, is there anything wrong?" Riley was worried. Buffy was usually so confident.
"No, no. Just a bad memory from that area." Yeah, like dying.
Giles moved further into the cavern, his movements more comfortable now that the bruises were healing. One advantage of being a demon; fast recuperative powers. He had an idea he'd be grateful for that before his time in this form was over.
At first he'd wanted to rush back to Willy's and make Ethan turn him back into a human. The knowledge that Buffy and her new friends would be looking for him was one of the reasons for his decision not to do that. Also, Ethan may have been waiting for him, and he didn't want to walk into a trap. So, he'd decided to find sanctuary, at least until nightfall. Which had led him to this damp, miserable place. The one place Buffy wouldn't search for him. It was the only place she never ventured. The place where she'd died.
Ethan Rayne sat at the table of the private room, sipping at a fairly tolerable glass of whiskey. The stuff was okay when drunk, but when sober it left a lot to answer for. Still, there were a couple advantages to staying where he was. One, no demon could enter the room without his express invitation. And there were some upset demons out there. And the second, oh the second. And the best. Ripper would come looking for him here. He couldn’t wait to see his old mates face when he realised Ethan’s gift for him. In fact, Ripper was late. He should have been back before this. Ethan checked his watch once more, trying not to let his concern turn to worry.
A knock at his door broke his reverie. Ah, at last. "Come in." The door opened, but no footsteps could be heard. Turning in irritation, he addressed his visitor. "No need to stand on ceremony, old…..Oh my god!" Instead of a nineteen year old Rupert Giles, before him stood one of the most terrifying demons he’d seen. Taller and much heavier than him, the green skin seemed to shimmer in the light. What was more terrifying however were the eyes. He’d never seen such rage and anger in his life. And it was all directed at him. "Wh-what do you want? Willy!"
The demon began to growl, the sound guttural and dangerous. It appeared to think that Ethan could understand it, and began to beat on the invisible barrier in frustration. It’s growl turned to a roar and Ethan heard the sounds of patrons vacating the bar behind it.
"G-go away. Whatever you want I can’t help you. "Besides, you can’t get in. Demons aren’t allowed. Willy!!!"
At last the bartender appeared behind the demon. "Whoah! Ease up there big guy." When the demon turned to glare at him, Willy backed up. "It’s no use making a noise like that. I can’t help you and," he pointed toward Ethan, "he won’t. My advise. Get out of here before the slayer turns up." Both men noticed the pulling up of the demon. "So you know the slayer. Well she’ll hear about the ruckus you made, and she’ll come over here to skin you. If I were you," he leaned in closer as if to relay a secret, "I’d get out of town. She’s a tough one this slayer." The demon growled at Willy before turning back to Ethan. Giving the Englishman a malevolent stare, it growled once more before turning and shuffling away.
The two men stared at each other in silence. "I suppose I should thank you."
"Hey no problem. Think of it as payback for saving my life from slayer’s revenge last night when you took care of the watcher." Willy started to turn away, but hesitated. "Hey what did you do to get that demon so angry anyway?"
Ethan shrugged. "I don’t know. Never seen it before." He turned back to the table. "Oh, you haven’t seen…"
"No. And I told you when he turned up, I’d let you know."
Buffy turned the corner hesitantly, her crossbow at the ready. She was tense she knew. And it wasn’t just because of the demon they were hunting. She hated this place with a vengeance. Moving a few feet further on, she hesitated, wondering if she’d truly sensed something, or if it was her nerves going overtime. At the sound of a footfall behind her she spun around, ready to fire.
Riley froze, then sighed in relief when it was obvious she wouldn’t fire. "You can relax, it isn’t here."
Buffy lowered her crossbow. "Are you sure?"
He nodded. "The pheromone trail is all over the place. It was here, and pretty restless, but it’s moved on now. Besides there was a sighting at a place called Willy’s Bar."
Her hand slipping down to her side, Buffy moved past Riley. "Figures. Any lowlifes in town eventually find their way to Willy’s. At least it gets me out of this place."
Riley turned to look at her as she passed him. "What is it about this place? I know you said bad memories, but what could have happened here to make you so jumpy?"
She looked around the cavern. "Oh nothing much. I just died."
The two men walked side by side in argument. Their differences in character were obvious by their appearance. One, the typical American teenager, his personality only just emerging in his look, the way he wore his clothes. The other, sure of who he was, his peroxide hair as much of a statement as his black leather jeans and black tee-shirt. If a stranger were to pass them, he would wonder how they came to be together, for they could not have anything in common to be friends.
"I still don't know why you're tagging along."
"Tagging along?" Spike's derision was evident. "Listen mate, if I'd let you come on your own you'd be some vamp's snack by now."
Xander turned on the English vampire, his lips curled in an oft-practised sneer. "Well you tried for years, and I managed to outlive your grrr-ness."
"Only cause the slayer protected your sorry butt!" The two stood toe to toe, itching to start a fight. Spike couldn't because of the chip in his head, only his pride kept him from backing down.
Xander admitted he couldn't hit the vampire when there was no chance of an even fight, no matter how much he hated him. 'Sides, what if he could hit back and was only pretending? Xander didn't want to be the one to test that particular theory. He finally stepped back. "You saying you came to protect me?"
"No." Spike turned back toward the path. "Giles has my mug. And he said he might actually get some Guinness in this week."
"And you think he'd share it with you? Even his bestest bud wouldn't get a sip of that stuff, never mind one of the enemy." The two continued their walk, both eager to reach their destination.
Spike snorted. "He's a pushover. I just lay on the sad puppy dog eyes and…," he paused as he noticed the front door. "Giles expecting company?"
Xander noticed what Spike was indicating. The door was leaning precariously against the frame, almost as if somebody had knocked it down, then put it back up. Somebody or something. He swallowed, only his concern for Giles making his feet move forward. He looked nervously at Spike as he made his way to the lit apartment. The vampire moved silently ahead of him. Grabbing the door on either side, he lifted it to the side.
Xander crept over the threshold, suddenly very glad Spike had joined him on this visit. Not seeing any rampaging demons or vampires running around, he called out his friend's name. "Giles?" Rounding the corner, he froze at the sight before him. "Oh man."
Spike walked around the boy, curious what shook him. Not that he was really concerned about Giles, he just wanted some of the Englishman's secret stash of the good booze. What he saw caused him to pause too.
The demon that Buffy and the Initiative were searching for stood in Giles' living room, one of the Englishman's precious books open. It took the two a moment to realise that it was also wearing his spare pair of glasses, and that it appeared to be trying to read the words on the pages. It looked up at the two of them, the three of them staring at each other in a frozen tableau of shock.
Suddenly, Xander screamed, startling the two demons. Dropping the book on the couch, the blue demon ran toward the back door. "Hey!" Spike ran to intercept him, only to be pushed away with a growl. Before he could recover the demon had escaped into the night. Confused, he turned back to Xander.
"H-he…" Xander gulped. "It looked just like Giles! Only more demony."
"What are you saying?" Buffy handed Xander a mug of tea as she moved closer to him. She looked to her left at the sound of something breaking. "Hey, careful with that lot guys. It’s really, really old." She looked at Xander and Willow sitting on the couch. "Alright, most of the stuff here is old. Don’t break anything!"
The team of young men paused in their investigations, turning toward their leader for a command. Riley looked over at Buffy, then shrugged his shoulders. They want back to looking for clues, moving things around carefully.
Xander cringed as he saw one of Riley’s friends lift up a small porcelain figurine. If Giles was there, he’d have read that guy the same riot act that Xander’d gotten when he did the same thing. "I don’t know. This guy seemed to know what he was looking at. And, he was wearing Giles’ glasses."
"This is the book?" At his nod, Willow started leafing through the pages.
"What did.." Buffy hesitated, then lowered her voice. "What did you friend say, from out of town?"
Spike had left just before Buffy and the Initiative had turned up, slipping through the back to return to his crypt. "My – friend – said that this kind of demon just kept to themselves. Never mingled with any of the others. Weren’t that many around now. They’d appear in a town, wander around a bit, then move on."
"And there was no sign of Giles?"
Xander nodded. "No sign of Giles. No sign of a struggle, except for the door. The only thing out was the dust."
"Dust?" Riley paused as he heard Xander’s comment. "As in possible vampire dust?"
"As in household dust. The place is dusty." Xander turned back to Buffy and Willow.
"So? Every house gets dusty."
"Not Giles’," Buffy explained, "he keeps the place spotless cause of all the OLD," this as Forrest picked up another object. He put it down sheepishly, "stuff here."
Willow elaborated. "He said that there’s that much magic and powders and stuff round here, we have to keep the place as clean as possible. If there’s dust, it means he hasn’t been around for a few days." She glanced around with a worried look.
Noticing Willow’s concern mirrored in Buffy’s eyes, he placed his hand against her arm comfortingly. "Don’t worry, we’ll find him."
"I know. And he’ll be alive, and human," she glared at Xander at that, "and he’ll have a very good answer for why that demon thing was here." Nodding at her, Riley rejoined his men in their search.
"Buffy," Willow spoke her friend’s name quietly. The other two looked over, knowing she’d found something. "This book is about shape-shifting spells. This demon was looking for…"
"No!" Buffy didn’t realise she’d raised her voice. "No. That – that thing is not Giles!"
"But.."
"Drop it guys. It’s not Giles! He’s off sulking somewhere because I wouldn’t involve him." She walked away, fury in every step.
Willow sighed as she hugged the book to her chest, her breath icing in the chill air. She moved along the path cautiously, her eyes darting around as the trees rustled in the wind. At least there was a full moon, so she could see her way.
At the remembrance of what else a full moon would mean her breath caught. It still hurt, thinking of him. But, it was getting better. And now she had help to get over him. She smiled in anticipation of Tara’s eagerness to help her. The other witch was willing to follow where Willow led. Which was a new experience for the Wicca. Even Oz for all his easygoing made a lot of the decisions. Willow decided she liked being the strong one for a change.
A rustling to her left broke her reverie. Increasing her pace, she hurried toward the university campus. She’d been wrong to lie to Buffy about where she was going, but she wasn’t ready to share Tara yet. It was all too new. And Buffy was so against the idea that the demon might be Giles that she wouldn’t have listened anyway. Not that Willow was sure she believed, but living on the Hellmouth, you get to not not believe anything.
Turning a bend in the path, she stopped at the site before her. A demon shuffled across the path, grunting as it moved. The moonlight reflected on its scaly skin, the tail flicking slowly back and forth. This was obviously the demon everybody was looking for. Looking around to make sure they were alone, Willow stepped closer. "Giles?" The demon paused, then continued on. She called out louder. "Giles?" This time the demon stopped and turned toward her. It grunted when it saw her. "Giles, it’s me Willow. I-I think I can help you."
The demon slowly moved closer, its lips lifted in a half smile. Willow smiled back. "I found the book, and I have a friend who can…"
The demon roared, increasing its speed until it was running at her. Willow screamed as she realised she had nowhere to run. Dropping the book, she lifted her hands to ward it off.
A large mass leapt out from the demon’s right, its momentum propelling them both off the path. Willow watched in shock as a second demon began to attack the first, their fight vicious. Whimpering, she picked up the book then started moving backwards. It didn’t matter which of them won, she knew better than to hang around and become demon bait. Waiting only until she was back around the bend, she turned and ran as the sounds of the battle continued into the night.
She worked silently, packing the duffel bag with extra bolts, a couple of knives and a sword. Her expressionless face, coupled with her efficient actions gave the appearance of somebody just doing their job. Anybody who knew her would tell you otherwise. Buffy Summers was royally pissed, and by the end of the night there would be one less demon roaming around Sunnydale.
Behind her Willow sobbed quietly, her hands wrapped around a cup of Giles’ Chamomile tea. It had been automatic to run back to the apartment, as if Giles would be there to save her. Fortunately, Buffy and Xander hadn’t left. Once she’d told her story Buffy had stiffened, going straight into warrior mode.
"You say the other one saved you?" Xander knew something was wrong with what happened to Willow. He just couldn’t put his finger on it.
Willow nodded, then hesitated. "Well, it attacked the other one. I-I don’t know if it realised I was there. I didn’t hang around to find out."
"Well there goes your theory about Giles turning into a demon." Scorn was evident in Buffy’s tone.
Xander tried to defend his idea. "There were two demons.."
"Yeah, and either one of them could have killed Willow!" The harshness in her voice brooked no argument. "Besides, you said the demon you saw was blue. The same color of the first one Willow met."
"I-I said I thought it was blue. The moonlight wasn’t that strong. It could have been blue or green, or.."
"Pink with purple polka dots. It was the blue demon that attacked you Willow. Maggie was right. It’s a killer and has to be destroyed. Well tonight is not gonna be its lucky night."
Xander stood up. "Where do we go?"
"WE don’t." Buffy softened her tone at the look on her friends’ faces. "I’m going in with Riley and his squad. I don’t want you two in danger, and I don ’t want you hesitating because you think it might be Giles." This last was thrown at Xander.
"Well, be careful. Willow and I will wait here, in case we hear from Giles." He hesitated. "What if you’re wrong?"
Buffy lifted her duffel bag and slid a crossbow into the sheath on her back as a knock came at the door. "I’m not." Crossing over to the door, she opened let Riley in. "Well?"
"We did a trace where Willow got attacked. There’s a lot of demon blood, mixed. They did some damage to each other. One’s pretty bad though. Their pheromones are strong. We’ve traced which way they’re both headed."
Buffy didn’t need to ask their destination. "The Master’s Lair."
She moved through the cave, her crossbow primed and at the ready. Riley and his squad were tracing the demons through their tracking devices, but she didn’t need anything like that. She could sense it. The demon was near, and she was going to take it down. Then she was going to find Giles and beat him up for disappearing.
She paused at an outcrop on the cave face. Bending down, she brushed her fingers along a phosphorous yellow patch. Demon blood definitely. As long as it didn’t die before she got to it. Straightening, she moved forward slowly.
The gentle dripping of water from the cave roof was the only break in the silence. Placing her feet carefully on the slippery rock, she moved further into the depth of the earth, and closer to the place of her death. Concentrating only on the job at hand, pushing back her memories, she turned a corner on the path and then hesitated.
Smiling, she slipped into a crevice on the rock face, her cross bow vertically in front of her. Several moments passed before she heard what she ’d been waiting for. Taking a breath, she spun away from the rock, bringing her weapon down and at the ready. She prepared to fire.
Slayer and Demon stared at each other, just a few feet separating them. The crossbow remained steady, pointed directly at the beast’s heart. Neither moved as each waited for the other to decide how this would end. Green blood oozed from several wounds on the demon’s body, but it made no effort to staunch the flow. In its eyes was a look of resignation, as this moment was destined from the beginning.
Buffy moved slightly, distracted for a moment. Her eyes wide, she cried out without thought. "Duck!" The beast automatically did her bidding, crouching down on the ground. The bolt missed the top of its head by mere inches as it sailed past. A cry of pain echoed in the cavern as the point hit its mark.
The demon slowly rose, then turned to see what it had been saved from. Another demon stood behind it, an arrow imbedded in its chest. Yellow fluid flowed over its green body as it staggered back, trying to remove the offending object. Turning back to Buffy, the first demon held out its hand.
Buffy bent down to the duffel bag, extracting the sword she’d packed almost as an afterthought. Placing it in the beast’s hand hilt first, she stepped back. The sound of running feet echoed as it turned to its enemy. Lifting its arms high, it swung the blade in a smooth arc, removing the head of the monster before it. Watching the body fall, it weakly allowed its arms to drop by its sides, the sword clattering to the ground.
Buffy held her hand up as Riley and his squad came into view. When one of them would have fired, she stepped in front of his target. Slowly she moved forward, pausing within arms distance of the demon. "Giles?" Head lowered, the beast turned. Tears fell from its eyes as it nodded wearily. "Oh god, Giles. It’s going to be alright." As he slumped, she quickly took his weight. Turning to the men, she issued orders. "We have to hurry, he’s lost a lot of blood. We need to get him back to the apartment. Help me." When none of them moved, she looked at Riley. "It’s Giles, and he’s dying!"
Riley waited on the couch as the three people moved quickly and efficiently. He’d already reported in to Maggie, and had received her permission to wait. She wasn’t happy that the demon hadn’t been brought in. Like himself she was sceptical that it could be Buffy’s Mr. Giles. But they’d agreed to wait, and so now he sat while Buffy and her friends hurried to save the demon’s life.
Finally the three of them tiredly walked down the stairs, their body covered in drying demon blood. Willow pushed the hair off her forehead with the back of her hand. "I think we got all the wounds. He just needs to rest now." Like the others, she’d been shocked and horrified at the extent of his wounds. How he’d survived, even as a demon, none of them knew. "He must have been hurt when he saved me."
Xander rested his hand on his friend’s shoulder. "It isn’t your fault Will. He was just being Giles."
"But the other one was green. How could I…"
"Willow," Buffy’s voice was tired, yet there was an extra strength there. "You couldn’t have known. At least you tried. I was gonna shoot him."
"Why didn’t you?" The three of them finally turned to Riley. "I mean, how did you know?"
Buffy’s body swayed slightly. "I didn’t." She walked to the window, ignoring the three shocked faces behind her. "Not really. The whole scene just reminded me of something, a dream. I didn’t know for sure until I told him to duck. If he hadn’t…"
"But he did." Willow tried to put some enthusiasm in her voice. "He knew to trust you."
Xander finally shifted. "I better get going. I have to swing round my place to pick up," he hesitated when he remembered Riley was there, "some supplies."
"Where are you going?"
Buffy turned. "We know who did this to Giles. He was able to let us know where to find him too."
"How?"
Willow smiled. "Oh, Giles has his ways. Be careful" This was to Xander as he left the apartment.
"So who did this to your friend?"
Buffy and Willow glanced at each other, before the blonde answered. "An old friend. Ethan Rayne."
Ethan leaned back in his chair, enjoying the midnight snack. He didn’t want to admit, even to himself, that he was concerned. Ripper should have come back by now, but he hadn’t. The spell was a relatively simple one, and should have taken effect immediately. So why wasn’t his friend here thanking him? If it wasn’t for the demon who’d tried to attack him before, he would have left Willy’s and gone looking for his old mate.
A knock on the door broke his reverie. His first reaction was to jump up and swing the door open, greeting Ripper with open arms. But years of experience, and memories of monsters who don’t enjoy a hug for a greeting made him pause. Finishing off his meal, he rose and pulled on the doorknob.
"Hello Ethan." One of Ripper’s pesky children stood on the other side, the dark haired boy. Pity it wasn’t the redhead. Beside him stood a slightly older man, his bleached hair and leathers screaming his rebellious nature. "Can we come in?"
Ethan stepped back, his survival instincts screaming out a loud warning. "What are you doing here? Where’s Rupert?"
"Well, that’s why we’re here." Xander pulled away from the frame he’d been leaning against and walked through the doorway. He paused as if waiting for his friend, but the other one just stayed where he was. "Giles wants us to take you to him." Ethan shook his head, backing further away. "Come on now, you don’t want to make this any harder than it has to be do you?"
Taking his chances, Ethan darted toward the door, hoping to bowl the other one over. He’d almost made it too, until the blonde grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him against the wall. The boy sauntered up to him. "Now that was silly. What was it? A ward?"
The other one finally spoke. "Yeah. Couldn’t get in or out."
Ethan stared on in shock as the blonde’s face began to change. "You – you’ re…."
Blonde smiled. "Yeah, I am ain’t I?"
"And if you want him to explain, you’ll come along nicely." Patting Ethan on the head, Xander moved ahead as the blonde vampire dragged Ethan away from his sanctuary.
Buffy stood as she heard a commotion at the door. Turning, she waited with her arms crossed. Xander and Spike dragged a complaining, actually whining Ethan through the door. “Well, well, well. Look what drifted back in town.”
Ethan was pushed by one of his captors until he faced Buffy over the couch. Knowing his old pal couldn’t be far away, and would be more grateful than these whelps, he allowed some of his confidence to return. “Buffy. How are you dear? Got any new tattoos?”
“You are skating on very thin ice. The only reason I haven’t killed you is so you can undo what you did to Giles.”
“Undo..” Before Ethan had a chance to complete his comment he was interrupted by the Billy Idol imitation.
Spike had been looking around for a sign of the remaining presence of Buffy’ s boyfriend. “Where’s your tin soldier boy?”
Buffy never took her eyes off Ethan. “I sent him home. There was no need for him to stay.” She moved around the couch and closed in on Ethan. Too quick for him to react, she shoved him against the wall, pushing her body into him. “Now, if by some sick perverted method of reasoning you think I’m coming onto you, let me assure you that your imminent death is even closer than our bodies.”
Ethan swallowed. He’d never seen the slayer that pissed. “Where’s Ripper? Didn’t he like my present?” By the slayer’s look, he’d obviously said the wrong thing.
“Oh, I don’t know. Let’s see, you turned him into a demon, he’s been chased by a whole bunch of army guys, got beaten up, and I almost killed him. What do you think?”
Ethan frowned in confusion. “Demon? What are you talking about? I turned him into a nineteen year old.”
It was Buffy’s turn to frown. “What would make you think Giles would want to be a teenager again?”
“Maybe he thought it was the only way you’d pay any attention to him.” Buffy released him in shock. Straightening his clothes, Ethan decided to get down to business. “Are you sure it’s Rupert?”
“I’m sure. Your spell went wrong.”
“I don’t think so. It only required him to…..” Ethan stopped, shocked by a memory. “Oh Janus.” He looked down at Buffy urgently. “Where is he?”
“Upstairs. What’s the rush?” She yelled after his retreating back as he rushed up the steps.
“The spell has a time limit on it. If I don’t reverse it, he’ll remain a demon forever.”
Buffy let him go, then remembered the state of Giles. “Ethan wait! He’s badly hurt. If you turn him right away, the shock of the wounds could kill him.” She ran after him.
Spike and Xander looked at each other in the remaining quiet. “Well, I’ll get going?”
“Wait. Aren’t you gonna stay to see what happens?”
The blonde vampire turned back to the young boy. “Nah. People’d think I was getting maudlin. I only did it cause I owed Giles. ‘Sides, a feller doesn’t get much appreciation round ‘ere.”
Xander waited until Spike was at the door. “Spike.” The other man turned back to him. “Thanks.” The two nodded at each other before Xander found himself alone. He paced the floor for a minute, then decided he couldn’t wait downstairs as if he was an expectant father. He took the steps two at a time.
Ethan tiredly made his way down the stairs. Three pairs of eyes looked expectantly up at him. He sighed. “With plenty of rest he should make it. But knowing Ripper he’ll open his wounds a few times before they heal completely.”
Buffy stood. “And he’s back to normal?”
A look of bitterness crossed Ethan’s face. “Oh yes. Back to how he was before. Physically anyway.” He paused to gather his jacket from the coat hanger. Probably the little redhead left it there for him. “Oh, he said you’ re not to kill me this time. The spell going wrong was his fault, and you’ll get a chance next time. Although I didn’t appreciate that last bit.”
“What did he mean, his fault?” Ethan had been surprised at how much help the girl Willow had been. She’d obviously been practicing her magic. Untrained though and wild. Obviously Ripper hadn’t taken her under his wing. Knowing his old friend, Ethan doubted that was by choice.
“The spell I cast required the subject to utter their wish as the absorbed the herbs and the incantation was spoken. Rupert had drawn on his toke…”
“Giles was doing drugs?” Funny, after all the lad had seen, he got upset over the idea of their mutual friend having a bit of weed.
“Herbal this time. Although he didn’t know it,” Ethan shrugged. It wasn’t important. “Anyway what I didn’t know as that he’d already drawn on his, er, cigarette and spoken a wish. By the time I told him to wish he were nineteen it was too late. The other wish was put in place.”
“But why would Giles want to be a demon?”
“Same reason I thought he might want to be a teenager again.” Ethan and Buffy stared at each other as they remembered their aborted conversation from earlier on. “Time for me to go.”
“Wait. What makes you think he needed to do something for me to notice him?”
Ethan sighed. How he hated taking the part of the moralizing good. “Because I’d spent the whole bloody night listening to him wallowing about how you didn’t need him any more, how you left him out and ignored him, and never told him anything. And because when I found him he was trying to get himself killed by some demons at Willy’s bar.”
Buffy hung her head. “I never meant..”
“Of course not! But you’re the slayer aren’t you. The Chosen One. She who sacrifices everything. Rupert thought that always meant that it gave you the right to behave more, selfishly, than other girls. I disagreed. Because I always knew one of the first things his slayer would sacrifice was him. And we were good friends once.” He shook his head. He knew it wasn’t worth the words trying to argue with her. “Tell Ripper I probably won’t see him next time I’m in town. But it was fun not being his enemy just once more.” With that, he left, a despondent and shocked trio standing silently behind him.
He didn’t want to move. He wasn’t sure why, but he knew if he moved he’d wake up. And waking up was something he needed to avoid at all costs. Better the blessed dark void of sleep than the soul destroying dark void of wakefulness. But of course the more he tried to hold himself still, the harder his muscles fought against him. Eventually, he succumbed to that which he dreaded most. His right leg straightened, shooting shards of pain throughout his body.
Moaning at the agony, Giles opened his eyes. His eyes watering at the pain, he was unable to recognize his surroundings at first. Only after blinking the tears away did the familiar contours of his bedroom come into shape. Sensing a presence in the darkness behind him, he slowly turned his head.
Anya looked at him expectantly. "It’s about time. You’ve been asleep for a long time, and it’s very boring watching you. At least Xander makes noises when he’s in the middle of one of his sex dreams. Of course, then I have to wake him up to…."
"Wha..?" Giles licked his lips and cleared his throat to remove the gravel from his voice, "What are you doing here?"
"Xander asked me to stay." The two stared at each other until Anya finally realized that Giles was waiting for more information. "Oh. The others had to go to Initiative headquarters for a debriefing. I wasn’t involved so I didn’ t have to go. Besides, you wouldn’t get me anywhere near there. They might decide to lock me up."
Giles closed his eyes against the incessant drone of her voice. The pain in his head had now been joined by a dull throb, which increased as she continued on. Finally, unable to take any more, he interrupted her. "Anya, I appreciate you staying but I’m fine now. You can leave."
"But don’t you want the bathroom first? Xander was worried you might need to go to the bathroom, so I was to stay and help you."
He had felt an extra pressure on his bladder, but at her words it amazingly disappeared. "No. Thank you, I’m fine."
"You won’t try to do anything until the others come back?"
"They’re returning?" He wondered if she could hear his bitterness. Once again they’d abandoned him. Had he really expected anything else?
"They said they would. But you know Buffy. Xander should be back though. He promised to pick me up."
"Yes. I know Buffy. Thank you Anya. I’ll tell Xander you did a good job of me."
"Yeah. Thank you Anya." They both turned at the new voice. Neither had heard Buffy arrive. That she wasn’t happy was obvious, even to the normally obtuse Anya. "If you’ve finished upsetting Giles I’ll take over for now."
Giles shifted as his own anger rose. "Don’t take your temper out on…," he hissed as he pulled at some of his wounds. "Anya was only doing what you asked. There’s no need to snap at her if you had to curtail your enjoyment to come back and play nursemaid."
Buffy’s lips pinched together, whether in anger or pain he didn’t know. And at the moment he didn’t care. "Is that what you think of me?"
He closed his eyes, willing his suffering body to relax. "I don’t know what to think any more Buffy."
As if finally remembering their audience, Buffy turned to Anya. "Thanks for waiting Anya. Xander’ll be back in a few minutes." Buffy waited, but the other girl didn’t move. "If you’d like to wait downstairs?" She waited until they were alone before turning back to Giles. "I wanted to wait until you were better, but I guess you won’t believe that I was thinking about you." At his tight expression she knew she was right. "It’s time we had a talk."
Giles placed his arms either side of his body, tightening his muscles as he prepared to lift himself up. He hissed as sharp stabs of pain lanced through his body. As Buffy moved to help him, he growled at her, “I can do it!”
She shook her head, waving away his protests as she gripped his upper arms. “Yeah, looks like it. You’re as weak as a baby Giles.” Pulling him forward, she rested his weight against her as she piled the pillows behind him. When she was satisfied, she gently lowered him back. “Sorry to punch your manly pride there, but you couldn’t lift a flea right now.”
“Thank you for the reminder!” His sharp words showed that he still wasn’t happy with her help. Turning his head away from her, he breathed deeply as the pain receded and the film of moisture in his eyes disappeared.
Buffy huffed. “Well, who’s going to be a grumblebum of a patient then. Maybe I should get Mom over to take care of you.” She crossed her arms. “Well? Who ’s going to start?”
Giles swallowed. “I’m sorry. It was irrational and foolish of me to spend time with Ethan and allow myself to be in such a state that he could cast a spell against me.” His words were mechanical, no emotion showing.
“And….?”
He turned to look at her in confusion. “I-I apologised..”
“Giles! Ethan said that y-you were taking drugs.” She lifted her hand as he opened his mouth. “Don’t tell me you didn’t know. You took a tote for God’s sake!”
A look of pure confusion crossed his face. “A what?”
“A tote. You know, funny cigarette? Joint?”
His expression cleared. “Toke. A tote is a bag of sorts.”
“Oh.” She frowned when she realized when he wasn’t amused at her faux pass as he usually was. “But you were, right?”
He sighed. “It was just some grass Buffy. At least, I thought it was,” at her disappointed face he added, “but I was wrong. It won’t happen again. I’m sorry.”
“Okay.” She opened her mouth to continue.
“So if we’re done, I’d like to get some sleep if that’s alright?”
It took just a moment to realize that he truly expected her to just leave. She bowed her head, upset that he seemed to think that was the end of it. “Why?”
He sighed, obviously wishing the conversation at an end. “Why did I do it?” At her nod, he shrugged. “Loneliness, boredom. Although in my own defence, I was already quite under the weather before Ethan came along.”
“That’s not an excuse Giles! I mean, why were you drinking at Willy’s anyway! You know what sort of clients he caters to! If they found out you were my Watcher..”
“Ex. Watcher.”
“Do you think they would have cared?”
“No! But I was more concerned that you obviously didn’t either!” He winced as he finished shouting at her. He’d have to remember that raising one’s voice pulled at more than the throat muscles.
Buffy stared at him in shock, tears gathering in her eyes. “How can you say that?”
He answered her whispered query quietly. “How can I think anything else? You ’ve made it obvious there’s no room in your life for me. You prefer Maggie Walsh and the Initiative over my aide. My God Buffy, you were there when I woke up.”
“Actually we were on our way back.” The disappointment on his face broke her heart. “It was a compromise. They wanted to drag you along to probe and prod and do tests with. If we agreed to debrief straight away, they promised to let you heal before questioning you.”
He nodded slowly. “Then I thank you. I’ll endeavour to ensure I’m well enough for their interrogation, sorry questioning when the time is ready. As for the rest, put it down to a tired, sore old man who’s feeling in the mood for some self-pity.”
The two sat silently for a few minutes. Buffy picked at the bedspread covering Giles’ lower body, battling hard to hold back the tears that threatened to break. “I had a dream. About you.” She looked up at him. “ I dreamt I was in the cave chasing something, and I fired and,” a sob broke free, “and I killed you.”
He sat still, no expression on his face as he looked at her. “You had a prophetic dream? And that’s why you excluded me from this search for the demon.” As she nodded, she expected something, an apology, or a smile of relief, but nothing. And then he continued. “Last year you would have come to me about this. Now, you don’t even trust me enough to tell me about something so important.”
“No! I wanted to keep some distance, so I wouldn’t…”
“There’s been distance between us for some time.” The annoyance in his voice was obvious. “Both physical and emotional. I hardly see you. You don’t bother training with me. The only time we talk is if there’s some monster to destroy. And then you only come for what I know. You’ve made it obvious you don’t want me in on the hunt. You didn’t even see fit to tell me about Riley and the Initiative. I had to hear that from Xander and Willow. The dream, and what happened this week is just an example of what’s gone wrong between us.”
“You mean what I’ve done wrong between us.”
“Yes.” The word was uncompromising.
“So you decided to go and get yourself drunk at a place where a demon could easily take you down. What? You wanted to see if I’d care enough to cry at your funeral?”
“Perhaps. There doesn’t seem much to live for does there?” Her gasp of pain told him how much he’d hurt her. Funny, but he really didn’t care. Not any more. He sighed, suddenly very tired. “Go away Buffy. Go play with your boyfriend and his soldier friends. Go ask Maggie Walsh how to kill the next baddie. I’m just too tired to care any more.”
“I-I don’t want to ask Maggie Walsh. Or play with the Initiative. I want us to be back the way before. You, me, and the others. The Scoobies. Keeping all the bad away so Sunnydale can stay blissfully ignorant. I want us to be a team again. How can I make it up to you?”
“I don’t know.” He closed his eyes, the pain draining his energy reserves. “I just don’t know any more. After you hid Angel when he first returned I didn’t think there was anything you could do to make me stop lo – caring about you. Now, I’m just not sure.”
She broke down, her body racking with the force of her sobbing. Unable to stop herself, she pressed her body against his, turning to her one constant for comfort. “I can’t do it without you. I need you. Don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me. I’m sorry. Don’t leave me.”
He held himself stiff, the memory of betrayals and broken promises battling with the hope that even now tried to find life in her embrace. They’d resolved nothing, and he knew she’d break his heart again. How could he put himself through that? She asked too much. His hand lifted almost as if of its own violation. Swallowing, he slowly began stroking the blonde head against his shoulder. "As usual you ask so much. Too much."
"No," wiping her eyes she lifted her head up to him, "asking too much would be asking that you weren't part of my life. Last year there was so much pain. We did so much to each other. I thought maybe you needed some space, so we couldn't hurt each other so much."
"Oh Buffy," unable to stop himself, he rubbed his cheek against her forehead, "don't you know the most painful thing you can do to me is abandon me? I have felt so useless this year, so unneeded. Not just by you. The whole world seemed to move away from me. But you were the one that really mattered."
Her eyes opened wide as she finally realised what she'd done to him. "I've been so stupid. I don't know how you can, but I need you to forgive me. Just tell me what to do. Please?"
He shook his head. "I don't know. I just don't know where we can go from here."
She nodded slowly. "Just - just let us go there together?" Her lips quirked slightly. "After all, you'll never know how I make it up to you if you aren't there will you?" He hesitated, before tilting his head in agreement. Buffy lay her head back against his shoulder. It wouldn't be easy, for either of them. But she knew as long as he was beside her, she'd have a fighting chance. Wasn't that always what he gave her?